Creating Family

By on Apr 23, 2014 in Giving, People

MARE’s Heart Gallery display of portraits of children awaiting adoption.

MARE’s Heart Gallery display of portraits of children awaiting adoption.

At the Massachusetts Adoption Resource Exchange, Inc.  (MARE), family isn’t always a group of people united by genes. Family is a matter of commitment, will, and compassion.

Children enter state foster care on a temporary basis so that the problem in the their birth families (usually neglect or violence) can be investigated and resolved. Foster parents sign up to provide safe, loving temporary care. They often do not know if it will be a few days or a few months until the children can leave foster care and be reunited with their birth families.

Janice Halpern, Director of Public Relations and Fundraising at MARE, explains that it doesn’t always work that way: “Most people sign up to provide temporary care for those who need temporary care. For some children, it becomes clear that the problems in the birth families cannot be fixed in time for the children to have a childhood there, so the children’s goal changes to adoption. 25 percent of kids in foster care have the goal of adoption.” These children need “forever families.”

While many foster parents do adopt the children they have fostered, many more are not able to make that life-long commitment. MARE connects children in state foster care who are in need of adoption with adults looking to adopt.

The organization educates the public about adoption from foster care and recruits potential parents for more than 750 waiting children each year.  Interested adults work closely with social workers to create a Home Study report, which serves as a profile that case workers use to tentatively match children with a forever family.

“The Home Study interviews and training are a way to help the family figure out what characteristics of a child they feel they would be a good match,” says Janice. “There are children in foster care with the goal of adoption who have medical issues, for example. Their feeding is done through a GI tube and there are adoptive parents who are nurses or have medical experience and those GI tubes are easy-peasy for them. But for parents who pass out at the sight of blood, that wouldn’t be a good match. That’s part of the work that families do with their social worker to determine the characteristics of a child that they’d be a great match for.”

Children in foster care and prospective adoptive parents play at a MARE Adoption Party. Credit: Brian Sullivan

Children and prospective adoptive parents play at a MARE Adoption Party. Credit: Brian Sullivan

Once a potential match is made, adoptive parents and some waiting children then have the opportunity to meet at MARE’s Adoption Parties. These events focus around fun activities like ice skating, horseback riding, and carnival games where adults and kids can play and get to know one another in a nonthreatening environment. Adoption Parties are MARE’s single most effective tool in matching children with families, accounting for 26% of the 178 children placed with pre-adoptive parents last year.

“With the exception of events like Adoption Parties, a lot of the matching happens behind the scenes. But the children have a say. They deserve a say, just as the family deserves a say in what child would join their family,” says Janice. Creating a family is a delicate process that the team at MARE supports with care, patience, and positive energy.

MARE could not help create successful families without the support of everyday people. As a private non-profit charitable organization, MARE receives less than half of its funding from the state, even though all the children MARE serves are wards of the state. The remaining balance comes from the support of foundations, individuals, and businesses like Yardi. “In a way, Yardi and MARE make such a great team,” Janice says. “We try to find great homes for kids and Yardi helps to provide great homes!”

Individual supporters are encouraged to spread the word about MARE’s services. Those who are considering adoption are invited to learn more. To make a difference in the lives of one of the 100,000 kids  nationwide who are waiting for adoption, visit MARE.